There was a time when I walked for exercise without a dog. Sure, it was over 9 years ago, but there was a time. I had injured my back and walking was the only exercise I could do to get in my aerobics. I have walked two days in a row, and I have had two very sorry days. It’s a habit I need to break. I think I need to go back to cycling. I have fewer Hardy memories when it comes to biking, but I still have memories.
The day I bought the bike, I had established a way to cycle with Hardy. I bought a basket for the front of my bike so that I could tote my things to and from work easily, and it quickly became a way to bring Hardy along on bike rides. I could tell that he didn’t totally LOVE it, but he would tolerate it. He never jumped out of the basket, and people would comment about how cute he looked. It was adorable.
One week before the attack, Hardy got to go on a bike hike to San Ramon on the Iron Horse Trail. We rode all the way to a frozen yogurt place, and stopped for sustenance before turning back towards home. Hardy was my basket passenger, adding an extra fifteen pounds to my load. I didn’t even notice. We stopped at the dog park on the way home. It was a nice day.
There are several celebrities who’ve lost their dogs and grieved publicly over their loss. I’m trying to use them for inspiration. Through them, I can see that people move on afterwards. I just can’t figure out how. I remember when Oprah lost her beloved cocker, Sophie, and Mathew McConaughey, lost his dog, Ms. Hud, while he was touring the US, and Barbara Streisand lost her little Coton de Tulear, Sammie. All three of them got over their loss, and eventually got a new dog after recovering. All I can think about is how I just want my Hardy back.
1 comment:
It is not easy Kath, but I have gotten past it several times. I have memories of Brownie, Cissy, Suzette, Sara Rose, and now I have my sweet baby girl Cinderella! Wow... they all hold special places in my heart! Saying good bye to your buddy, confident, loving friend hurts, hurts hurts. And yes, you want them back. Some say... "no I can not do this again. I will not get close and have another dog." But think of the joys you would miss!
I love my Cinderella girl.... she is so close to me. Just like you and Hardy! I got Cindy at 9 weeks old.... for Mothers Day from Roger. It had been 10 months without a dog here, and our youngest son was gone to college. I knew he would not return here to live. Roger said he thought I needed to be a mother again..... He was right. Like Hardy she goes pretty much everywhere with us.
Cinderella is now 10.... how can that be? Time .... a strange thing. I want her to stay young forever, but it is not to be. She has bad knees, so she limps. Sometimes she grunts when she gets up, and now she has a heart murmur as well..... ug! I protect her best I can. She is still a happy little girl, and we will enjoy her as long as we can. She rests at my feet now as I write this.
So.... what do we learn? Loving is a risk.... but worth the pain.... I do not think you would give up the joy of Hardy just to not have the grief. The wounds will heal, and in TIME you will be ready to give your heart again..... Hardy would want that for you.
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